INTRODUCTION
A Story
Sia was living with her parents. She was not too good in studies so, her parents always abuse her by saying you are not good enough, you are a dumb child, see your cousin and brother they are toppers in their class but what you are doing? Nothing.... how someone bad as she is in studies. What her parents think is they does right with her...? and she is now suffering from self-doubt, trust issues, anxiety, stressed and guiltiness. What if, her parents motivate her instead of comparing her with others. Maybe she is motivated by her parents and working hard or maybe she focuses on her hobbies and living a healthy stress-free life. But in her case, she has trust issues in future because of childhood experiences
Conclusion- your childhood experiences reflect your personality in adulthood, if your past experience is good than your personality in future has more positivity but if you had some bad experiences in childhood than you face some issues like depression, anxiety, lack of confidence.
Why you feel stressed after scolded by parents
Because you are emotionally connected with them, if they scolded you then a hormone called cortisol release in your body. this hormone is responsible for stress and anxiety. But the question is how they impact you; this anxiety is not temporary this can also affect you in future. It can as well lead you to stress for small thinks and along with that, you're not comfortable to tell your problems because believing they don't understand you, you begin to conceal things and in this time you are right due to past experiences and if your parents still the same at that point they start again comparing you with others but if they doesn't do that and understands you later may be thinks can start changing and you feel comfortable around them moreover you don't hiding the problems or things.
You know, when I was a child, my parents always compared me to others. I felt so bad and neglected by them that I started hiding things from them. I thought if I shared my feelings or what happened to me, they would compare me to others again. Now, I'm 21 and still hiding things from them. If you face the same, I understand. For those who don't, I'm happy for you!
How Early Experiences Define Who We Become
Our early experiences and the environment we grow up is play a significant role in forming our beliefs, values, and how we see the world. These, as a result, influence our behavior and personality as we grow older.
some significate roles influence our development: -
Attachment - let's take two situations
1st situation, consider a child who feels secure knowing their caregiver is consistently available and responsive to their needs. This child is more likely to explore their environment confidently and seek comfort when needed, showing a healthy attachment. This child is likely to develop into a confident, emotionally strong adult with healthy self-esteem. They tend to form strong, trusting relationships and have a better ability to manage with stress and adversity. They feel secure in exploring new opportunities and adapting to changes in life.
2nd situation, a child who experiences inconsistent or neglectful caregiving may struggle with trust and emotional control, leading to difficulties in forming stable relationships. This might lead to anxiety, depression, or difficulty to manage emotions. Their ability to overcome with stress and navigate complex social interactions could also be compromised, impacting their personal and professional life.
Education and Learning - When kids go to a good preschool or early school, they learn important skills like thinking and solving problems then they start to love discovering new things and working with others and great teachers and mentors can make kids excited about learning these positive interactions help kids feel good about themselves and want to keep learning. this early experience plays a crucial role in shaping our development and personality in adulthood the way we experience with our teacher and close one, that way we think and grow.
Example:
Positive Experience: Imagine a child goes to a fun preschool where they learn new things and make friends. They have a nice teacher who encourages them. This makes the child feel happy and confident, and they enjoy learning new things.
Negative Experience: Now, think of a child who doesn’t have a good school or teacher. They might not feel as confident or interested in learning, and it could be harder for them as they grow up.
Examples
Positive Influence: Imagine growing up in a culture that values education. This can encourage you to work hard in school and aim for higher goals.
Negative Influence: On the other hand, if you’re in a society that pressures you to fit a specific mold, it might limit your ability to express yourself freely.
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